Philippians 4 | At Water’s Edge

Gentleness Be Known

Have you ever had an argument with someone that took on a life of its own? Has a disagreement fractured your relationship to the point where you don’t know how to repair it? Do conflicts with others cause you to be distant, avoiding any contact? We’ve all been there. Sometimes arguments can last years, even to the point where we don’t remember exactly what it was about.

Our lectionary Scripture for today was written by Paul in response to an argument. You probably recognize the beautiful opening sentence: “Rejoice in the Lord always! Again I will say, rejoice!” so you may be startled to think this famous passage was directed to two women in the church of Philippi who had had a falling out. I kid you not. Faithful workers Euodia and Syntche had a big tiff over some unknown issue and were mad at each other. So Paul wrote these beautiful lines in his letter:

Philippians 4 (New Revised Standard Version, Updated Edition)

⁴Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. ⁵Let your gentleness be known to everyone. The Lord is near. ⁶Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ⁷And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

I wonder if they were embarrassed to be called out (which he does by name earlier in the chapter). His antidote to their squabble is to instruct them to let their gentleness be known to everyone … perhaps mostly to each other. He goes on to tell them to set aside their anxiety and replace it with prayer and supplication. I love that he added “with thanksgiving,” reminding them and us not to go to God in prayer with whining and complaining. When we guard our hearts and minds in Christ, annoying disagreements and outright fights can be dealt with by gentle discussion that includes acknowledgment of the other’s position and hopefully forgiveness …or at least a truce.

⁸Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. ⁹Keep on doing the things that you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, and the God of peace will be with you.

I think this last section speaks to those times when we can’t settle our differences. Is there any merit in the person you are arguing with? Can you name one positive trait, even in your anger? Can you see past your beef to find something honorable and commendable, even if they have not shown you those qualities? And more importantly, are you exhibiting this list of Christ- like qualities in your own life? Can they see these things in you?

Paul reminds us to think and meditate on anything excellent and worthy of praise. When we move from wallowing in our hatred to trying to see the good in everything around us, it is only then that we will know peace. Euodia and Syntche may have never been friends again, but the opportunity to focus on their common ground in Christ would enable them to put down the heavy burden of anger and work together.

How about you? Do you want peace? Rejoice, and let your gentleness be known.

Gentle Path by Kathy Schumacher

Merry Stressmas!

Posted on December 20, 2024 by Betsy

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!

for shopping and baking, and for Xanax taking when loved ones come near!

It’s the most wonderful time… for a beer.

We have reached that point in the “most wonderful time of the year” when stress is at its peak. Are you feeling it? Just this week I heard two parents say that their children cried on the way to school several days this week, other moms told me they are completely overwhelmed and exhausted, and a colleague reached out for prayer because she feels like she is drowning in obligations and commitments. Why, oh, why, do we do this to ourselves every year?

Friends, this is no way to celebrate the birthday of the Prince of Peace. Are you at peace in your heart, or is your life filled with worry and fretting? Here are six steps toward peace, reminding us that we won’t have peace on earth and goodwill toward all people until we have peace within.

Rejoice in the Lord.

Phil. 4:4 says to rejoice in the Lord always… not just rejoice occasionally. Not just rejoice when something great happens but rejoice in the Lord always. Making the choice to rejoice in every circumstance brings peace to your soul. Can you pause right now and rejoice that at least you are alive to survive another day?

React graciously to others.

Be gentle and forbearing… with everyone. Scripture teaches us that “A gentle word turns away wrath.” Paul says to let your words be seasoned with salt and designed to build up, not to cut down, designed to develop, not destroy, and designed to help, not to hurt. Let your graciousness be evident to all. If your stress and exhaustion are making you be short with your kids or your spouse, figure out a way to take something on your list and just say no.

Rest in the Lord.

Jesus said: “I will never leave you nor forsake you!” Remembering that Jesus is with you and that you abide in Him will help you rest in Him and experience his peace when you have none. As the Prince of Peace, he longs to meet you in a quiet moment, even in the carpool line or as you put your head on the pillow. Just ask him, and he will come.

Reach up to God in prayer.

Let prayer be your first response, not your last resort. Paul says: “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” (Phil. 6:7)

Reflect on positive things.

The battle for peace is primarily fought in the mind. We must take every thought captive to Christ. Take two minutes to meditate on God’s Word. In Phil. 4, Paul wrote: “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.”

Repent & resolve to obey the Lord

The Holy Spirit will not let us be at peace in sin, so we must confess, repent, and resolve to obey the Lord. The key is not the absence of troubles and trials or hurts and heartaches; but rather the key is the presence of God. When we confess and repent of our sins, we find an inner peace.

Pursuing peace will help us reduce our stress and be peacemakers. Where can you be a peacemaker in your workplace or your family? What better way to celebrate this last week of Advent could there be than to bring peace into your day? May the Prince of Peace make his presence known in your life today.

Peace Like a River by Michelle Robertson

The Best Smell

Posted on August 21, 2024 by Betsy

“Things that smell” and I are not good friends. I have an allergic reaction to many things that smell, so I tend to pull back if a heavily perfumed or overly after-shaved person tries to come in for a hug. Many a Sunday I have gone home with a headache because I am wearing someone’s perfume on my cheek and neck after a vigorous embrace. Mind you, I love a good hug, just not the after-effects.

I discovered many years ago that I can wear scented lotions (never perfume) if they smell like food products. True story! I have a healthy investment in vanilla, coconut, and lemony lotions from Bath and Body Works. They even have me on speed dial for when these products go on sale. Last week my youngest daughter told me that her son smelled a coconut scent in a store and asked if Nana was there. I love that he associated that smell with me.

You may remember several Old Testament allusions to making a “fragrant offering” to the Lord. I’m sure you also recall the story about Mary breaking the neck of the perfume jar to anoint Jesus’s feet. The smell of the fragrance filled the room (John 12:1-8). Notice what Paul does in today’s passage as he thanks the Philippians for their generous offerings:

Philippians 4 (Common English Bible)

¹⁰I was very glad in the Lord because now at last you have shown concern for me again. (Of course you were always concerned but had no way to show it.) ¹¹I’m not saying this because I need anything, for I have learned how to be content in any circumstance.¹²I know the experience of being in need and of having more than enough; I have learned the secret to being content in any and every circumstance, whether full or hungry or whether having plenty or being poor. ¹³I can endure all these things through the power of the one who gives me strength. ¹⁴Still, you have done well to share my distress.

Paul’s bold assertion in verse 4 that he can “do all things through Christ, who strengthens me” is one to print on your heart and sear into your mind. How often we forget that the source of our strength and the renewal of our courage are within him when we are without! Christ helped Paul to be content in every circumstance. Are you content in every circumstance? If not, what’s missing?

¹⁵You Philippians know from the time of my first mission work in Macedonia how no church shared in supporting my ministry except you. ¹⁶You sent contributions repeatedly to take care of my needs even while I was in Thessalonica. ¹⁷I’m not hoping for a gift, but I am hoping for a profit that accumulates in your account. ¹⁸I now have plenty and it is more than enough. I am full to overflowing because I received the gifts that you sent from Epaphroditus. Those gifts give off a fragrant aroma, an acceptable sacrifice that pleases God.

Isn’t’ that a lovely thank-you note? To tell the Philippians that their generosity gives off a fragrant aroma is a beautiful word-picture and a reminder of what happens when we offer a sacrificial gift at the altar. Truly it pleases the Lord.

Where is God inviting you to present a sacrifice of yourself that would be pleasing? Is there something you could do today to be the sweet smell of generosity for someone in need? When we give in this way, our gifts release fragrant aromas that fill the room with hope, love, and faith.

Sweet Smell by Michelle Robertson

Making Up is Hard to Do

Posted on October 13, 2023 by Betsy

Have you ever had a silly disagreement that grew so large, you forgot what the initial argument was even about? The practice of holding a grudge can take on a life of its own. When fractures in a relationship go on for weeks/months/years, the resulting estrangement is often hard to reverse. Tragically, the beginning of the end is sometimes a simple misunderstanding that cannot ever be untangled. Sometimes the disagreement wasn’t even your fault or responsibility. In my denomination, many people are severing friendships over polity issues that have nothing to do with personal relationships. A line has been drawn and through no fault of your own, you suddenly find that your friend has blocked you on Facebook and won’t respond to emails simply because you are on the other side of that line. It happens every day over politics, politicians, vaccines, the climate crisis, the border conundrum … people are falling out over issues that have nothing to do with their relationships. I bet it has happened to you, too.

Paul is very clear about what we are to do in these cases. He challenges us to iron out our differences and make up.

Philippians 4 (The Message)

4 My dear, dear friends! I love you so much. I do want the very best for you. You make me feel such joy, fill me with such pride. Don’t waver. Stay on track, steady in God.

²I urge Euodia and Syntyche to iron out their differences and make up. God doesn’t want his children holding grudges.

³And, oh, yes, Syzygus, since you’re right there to help them work things out, do your best with them. These women worked for the Message hand in hand with Clement and me, and with the other veterans—worked as hard as any of us. Remember, their names are also in the Book of Life.

God doesn’t want his children holding grudges. Does that feel like a punch in the gut? Think for a moment about someone you have walked away from over a small issue. Is it time to make up?

^4-5Celebrate God all day, every day. I mean, revel in him! Make it as clear as you can to all you meet that you’re on their side, working with them and not against them. Help them see that the Master is about to arrive. He could show up any minute!

^6-7Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

A life focused on God is a sure remedy for those times when we are focused on our anger and resentment. Paul’s sense of urgency about the coming of Christ put things into perspective. When it came to disputes, his perspective was “ain’t nobody got time for that!” And he’s right. Do you really have time to keep nursing your grudge, or is it time to let it go?

^8-9Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.

Allowing God to work us into his most excellent harmonies won’t happen until we throw down our boxing gloves and pick up things that are true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, and gracious. Sprinkle in a large measure of forgiveness over past hurts and you are on your way. When we fill our minds with things to praise, God is able to work everything together. Thanks be to God!

Fill Your Mind with Beauty by Michelle Robertson

Worries

Posted on October 5, 2020 by Betsy

Last week was filled with worries for all of us. Covid numbers are back on the rise, families are dealing with remote learning struggles, we experienced the debacle of the Presidential debate, many of us are worried over the elections…and to top it all off our President, First Lady, and key leaders in our government have tested positive for corona virus. Can 2020 get any worse? Have we all somehow stepped into the twilight zone?

When the world as we know it feels like it is crashing at our feet, it is always good and helpful to do two things: pray and turn to scripture. Amazingly (yet not surprisingly in the way the Holy Spirit works) the lectionary passage for today speaks directly into this unspeakable time. With the wisdom of the ages, God’s holy word written over 2,000 years ago offers exactly the right advice for today.

Rejoice.

When the diagnosis comes, rejoice. When death draws near, rejoice. When the sting of rejection is so hard you can’t breathe, rejoice. When divorce is requested, rejoice. When the world seems to be going straight to hell as you watch from your sofa, rejoice.

Who in their right mind would rejoice in this season? The people of God. You see, rejoicing casts out worry. Rejoicing opens up prayer. Rejoicing is the foundation for supplication to a Heavenly Father who is ready and able to hear your requests.

Rejoicing brings PEACE.

Philippians 4 (New Revised Standard)

The news this week will likely not be any better. In fact, it will probably be worse. But the God of peace is right here, right in the middle of it, right by our side. Paul didn’t say to rejoice when the news is good. He said to rejoice ALWAYS. Do not worry about anything.

So hang on to the good, the true, the honorable, the just, the pure, and the things that are pleasing to God. Set aside all of your worries and think about these things. Keep following Jesus, reading his word, praying for our nation, and focus on things worthy of praise.

Think about those things, and only those things, and the peace of God will be with you. His peace surpasses all understanding. The world can’t give us any peace, but the Lord is always near.

Again I will say, REJOICE!

WhatEVER

Posted on February 13, 2020 by Betsy

If you have ever had a teenager, if you have one now, or if you simply know a teenager, you have heard the word whatEVER waaay, waaay too much. It becomes the common response to EVERYTHING for a (thankfully) brief period of time…say, from age 11 to about 21. (31?) Often delivered with an eye roll, a foot stomp, and a perfectly dismissive tone of voice, whatEVER signals to the hearer that the speaker is finished with the conversation and has totally moved on. End of. Door closed. Don’t bother to knock.

Oh, the joys of raising kids!

In defense of the teens that we all raise and love, whatEVER also signals that your teen is overwhelmed, frustrated, distracted, and emotionally underwater. The dismissiveness is not always a lack of respect, as much as it feels like it. It is your kid’s way of saying, ”TOO MUCH. School is too much, social media is too much, my boy/girl friend issues are too much, the bullying at lunch is too much, my so-called-friends are too much, the pressures of hormonal life with an underdeveloped prefrontal cortex are just TOO MUCH.” It’s perhaps in this moment that they need Mom and Dad the most, even with the strong-arm/push-away behavior that they are exhibiting.

And don’t be fooled…whatEVERness is not just restricted to teenagers. Look around your friend group, your workplace, and your community, and you’ll find someone choosing dismissive and off-putting behavior as a way to deal with their own TOO-MUCHNESS.

WhatIF we could turn their WhatEVERs into something lovely?

Philippians 4

When someone comes at you full bore and you get blindsided by their hostility, it is a good thing to pause and consider what else is happening. It’s also important to think about what is true, honorable, just, pure, and pleasing about them. In other words, in the face of resistance, rebellion, and rudeness (whether from your kid or another adult) think to yourself: what is really going on? Is there ANY redeeming quality in this person (albeit not in this moment?)

If the answer is yes, take a deep breath and think about THOSE things. Then pray.

Someday, you will be glad that you did not overreact to your teenager’s hormones. Someday, you will be glad that you didn’t meet rudeness with rudeness. Someday that awful co-worker who was trying to undermine you may actually come back to apologize, and thank you for your graciousness.

And someday, that overwhelmed kid will be an overwhelmed parent of a teenager themself. And when that happens, and they come complaining to you about what their child just had the NERVE to say to them, you know what your response can be?

“WhatEVER!!!”

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