What Does This Mean?

Posted on by Betsy

Ages ago, I was a volunteer children’s choir director in my church. My youngest daughter helped me lead music for the 3rd-5th graders. We loved it. That age group is so open and honest … even brutally so, which made me make sure I had combed my hair and considered my clothing at every practice. They will tell you exactly what they think!

One year the music director gave us a score for a song that spelled out P E N T E C O S T. The verses explained what happened at Pentecost and the kids thought that celebrating the birthday of the church meant cupcakes and ice cream. Which we did provide, by the way. For me, I have always been grateful for that song, because I remember how to spell Pentecost simply by hearing the music in my head.

This Sunday is Pentecost. It might be celebrated in your churches with lots of red (to symbolize the flames), the Scripture read in different languages (ASL is my favorite), fans and balloons (to remind us of the mighty wind that took over Jerusalem), and fiery preaching (if you have a fiery preacher). It should also include cupcakes and ice cream, as Pentecost marks the official birth of the modern church.

If you don’t get cupcakes and ice cream this Sunday, file a complaint against the management.

Acts 2 (Common English Bible)

2 When Pentecost Day arrived, they were all together in one place.2 Suddenly a sound from heaven like the howling of a fierce wind filled the entire house where they were sitting. 3 They saw what seemed to be individual flames of fire alighting on each one of them. 4 They were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other languages as the Spirit enabled them to speak.

5 There were pious Jews from every nation under heaven living in Jerusalem.6 When they heard this sound, a crowd gathered. They were mystified because everyone heard them speaking in their native languages. 7 They were surprised and amazed, saying, “Look, aren’t all the people who are speaking Galileans, every one of them? 8 How then can each of us hear them speaking in our native language? 9 Parthians, Medes, and Elamites; as well as residents of Mesopotamia, Judea, and Cappadocia, Pontus and Asia,10 Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt and the regions of Libya bordering Cyrene; and visitors from Rome (both Jews and converts to Judaism), 11 Cretans and Arabs—we hear them declaring the mighty works of God in our own languages!” 12 They were all surprised and bewildered. Some asked each other, “What does this mean?”

What, indeed, does it mean?

First, the confusion of language at the Tower of Babel in Genesis 11 was reversed, and everyone could speak and hear in each other’s tongues. The picture of diversity in the Body of Christ cannot be overlooked here. God’s spirit was poured out on everyone … even the Cretans and Arabs.

Second, Jesus fulfilled his promise in this event to empower his followers to take the Gospel to the four corners of the earth. The power of the Holy Spirit came in a remarkable way, and it comes to us today with the same strength … if we will receive it.

Third, nobody was left out. This is a great reminder for us as we celebrate the church’s birthday. Who are we leaving out? Who needs an invitation to the party? After all, everyone likes cupcakes and ice cream.

May we celebrate a holy Pentecost! And may we arise as Pentecost people, ready to do God’s work in the world.

Pentecost Bloom by Michelle Robertson

Call the Ball

Posted on by Betsy

I did some research into the Fresnel lens used in lighthouses for a sermon I am writing and it led me down a rabbit hole about these kinds of lenses. I remembered that my husband, when he was a Navy pilot landing on aircraft carriers, used a directional system called the Fresnel Lens Optical Landing System (OLS). The light system is designed to provide a “glide slope” for aviators approaching an aircraft carrier. The lights are projected through the Fresnel lenses in three different colors, telling the aviator when the aircraft is at the desired altitude in the approach at any distance from the ship.

If the aviator sees a red light (at the bottom), it means that the aircraft is dangerously low, and the subsequent flashing red light activated by the landing signal officer (LSO) would indicate a wave-off requiring the pilot to go around for another attempt. Yellow lights means you are approaching the carrier too high and will miss attaching your plane’s tailhook on one of the four arresting wires on the deck. Green lights mean you are in just the right glide slope for a safe landing. As the pilot approaches the carrier, the LSO instructs him to “call the ball” and the pilot has to report what color light he or she sees on “the ball” (actually a nickname for calling this blob of light a meatball) on approach.

This, by the way, is why Navy pilots can’t be colorblind. 

If God, who acts as our Landing Signal Officer, commanded you to “call the ball” in regard to the quality of your discipleship, what color light would you see? God already knows. As David boldly asserted in Psalm 139, God knows when we sit and rise, he knows our thoughts from far away, and he has us hemmed in from behind and before, with his mighty hand upon us.

Psalm 139 (New Revised Standard Version)

1 O Lord, you have searched me and known me.
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
    you discern my thoughts from far away.
3 You search out my path and my lying down
    and are acquainted with all my ways.
4 Even before a word is on my tongue,
    O Lord, you know it completely.
5 You hem me in, behind and before,
    and lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
    it is so high that I cannot attain it.

7 Where can I go from your spirit?
    Or where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I ascend to heaven, you are there;
    if I make my bed in Sheol, you are there.
9 If I take the wings of the morning
    and settle at the farthest limits of the sea,
10 even there your hand shall lead me,
    and your right hand shall hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me,
    and night wraps itself around me,”
12 even the darkness is not dark to you;
    the night is as bright as the day,
    for darkness is as light to you.

13 For it was you who formed my inward parts;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
    Wonderful are your works;
that I know very well.
15     My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
    intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes beheld my unformed substance.
In your book were written
    all the days that were formed for me,
    when none of them as yet existed.
17 How weighty to me are your thoughts, O God!
    How vast is the sum of them!
18 I try to count them—they are more than the sand;
    I come to the end—I am still with you.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
    test me and know my thoughts.
24 See if there is any wicked  way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting.

Spend some time today thinking about your life and what you would see if God told you to “Call the ball.” The discipline of self examination is not just for Lent, you know! Would you see red, yellow, or green lights? Let’s face it … none of us is getting any younger. As you are descending onto the safety of God’s ship, how are you approaching? Are you too high, living a life of selfishness and luxury, focused on your own needs while neglecting the world’s needs? Are you too low, living a life of sin and separation from God, following the whims of the secular world in pursuit of pleasure, wealth, and greed? Or are you in the green zone of serving, giving, studying God’s work, and doing his will?

The good news is, as you call the ball, it’s never too late to adjust your altitude … and maybe your attitude.

My Frame Was Not Hidden by Michelle Robertson

Dem Bones

Posted on by Betsy

Sometimes we experience a death of something that seems impossible to revive. The death of hope, the death of a career, the death of a marriage, the death of a church, the death of a dream … life if full of little deaths that leave us feeling bereft and alone. It is good in those moments to remember that the prophet Ezekiel was once commanded to prophesy to a Death Valley filled deep with dead bones.

The fact that these bodies had not received a proper burial in the ground tells us that they died in disgrace. Their bodies had been left for the buzzards to consume. Nobody said words of comfort over them as they were lowered into the ground. No one stood beside a grave pit and mourned. No, these corpses were deliberately scattered across the desert and had been left there for a long time. We see this as a statement regarding the disgrace the Israelites had brought to their nation through their disobedience and apostasy. In his vision, Ezekiel sees the long lost nation of Israel lying in bones and ruin in a waterless expanse of desert. There was no hope anymore.

Then something completely unexpected happened. God commanded him to prophesy over the bones, telling them that God will put breath in them, and they will live again.

Ezekiel 37 (Common English Bible)

37 The Lord’s power overcame me, and while I was in the Lord’s spirit, he led me out and set me down in the middle of a certain valley. It was full of bones. 2 He led me through them all around, and I saw that there were a great many of them on the valley floor, and they were very dry.

3 He asked me, “Human one, can these bones live again?”

I said, “Lord God, only you know.”

4 He said to me, “Prophesy over these bones, and say to them, Dry bones, hear the Lord’s word! 5 The Lord God proclaims to these bones: I am about to put breath in you, and you will live again. 6 I will put sinews on you, place flesh on you, and cover you with skin. When I put breath in you, and you come to life, you will know that I am the Lord.”

This is certainly a statement of the power of God. Not a resurrection of the dead, but a complete reversal of the decomposing of a corpse. The bones came together, bone by bone, sinew by sinew, skin on skin. Not surprisingly, God put each body back together in a right and orderly manner.

Just as God does.

7 I prophesied just as I was commanded. There was a great noise as I was prophesying, then a great quaking, and the bones came together, bone by bone. 8 When I looked, suddenly there were sinews on them. The flesh appeared, and then they were covered over with skin. But there was still no breath in them.

9 He said to me, “Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, human one! Say to the breath, The Lord God proclaims: Come from the four winds, breath! Breathe into these dead bodies and let them live.”

10 I prophesied just as he commanded me. When the breath entered them, they came to life and stood on their feet, an extraordinarily large company.

Dead bones rise again to become a huge army. With the breath of God in them, they are empowered to become the house of Israel once again.

11 He said to me, “Human one, these bones are the entire house of Israel. They say, ‘Our bones are dried up, and our hope has perished. We are completely finished.’ 12 So now, prophesy and say to them, The Lord God proclaims: I’m opening your graves! I will raise you up from your graves, my people, and I will bring you to Israel’s fertile land. 13 You will know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves and raise you up from your graves, my people. 14 I will put my breath in you, and you will live. I will plant you on your fertile land, and you will know that I am the Lord. I’ve spoken, and I will do it. This is what the Lord says.”

We will be celebrating Pentecost this Sunday. This is a time when we commemorate the outpouring of the Holy Spirit on the disciples who were gathered in Jerusalem, waiting for this gift that Jesus had promised. The Spirit of God was delivered in tongues of flame and a mighty wind. Could you use a mighty wind right now?

What are you waiting for? Do you need the power of God’s Spirit to come and revive some aspect of your life? Have you experienced the death of hope or a dream?

If God can make a new nation of Israel out of old, dusty desert bones, surely he can revive you, too.

After the storm.

Naming Our Pain

Posted on by Betsy

I’ve been writing recently about the Book of Lamentations for an adult Bible Study that I have been assigned by Cokesbury, the United Methodist Publishing House. Lamentations was written by the prophet Jeremiah about the destruction of Jerusalem in 586 BCE. This collection of poems is an entire exercise in naming Israel’s pain, and as we read through it, Jeremiah’s faith is evidenced again and again. He never tries to solve their problems but lays it all at God’s throne. 

Jeremiah 1 (Common English Bible)

11 All her people are groaning, seeking bread. They give up their most precious things for food to survive. “Lord, look and take notice: I am most certainly despised.” 12 Is this nothing to all you who pass by? Look around: Is there any suffering like the suffering inflicted on me, the grief that the Lord caused on the day of his fierce anger? 13 From above he sent fire into my bones; he trampled them. He spread a net for my feet; he forced me backward. He left me devastated, constantly sick. 14 My steps are being watched; by his hand they are tripped up. His yoke is on my neck; he makes my strength fail. My Lord has handed me over to people I can’t resist. 

 It is painful to read Jeremiah’s despair over his fallen city, but he sets a proper example for us to take that pain straight to the Lord. Placing our pain in God’s hands is the antidote to the weeping and wailing that we all do from time to time. We are always invited to “take it to the Lord in prayer.” Doing this is not only cathartic, but practical. It is a humble admission that we cannot solve or fix things on our own. It is an act of obedience to stop trying to be self-reliant. It focuses our hearts on God’s sovereignty as well as God’s love for us. After all, God loved the world enough to ease the pain of sin by sending us Jesus. God can surely handle our pain.

You may have experienced opportunities to name and release your pain during worship services or at retreats. From writing something down and burning it, to sitting with a prayer partner and speaking it aloud, or simply opening up a personal journal and letting it all leak out of your pen, we are invited to practice this discipline as a way to let go of past hurts and grievances and move forward in the freedom of knowing that what you give over to God is gone from you forever.

 Read this verse from the Amplified Bible: 

“Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God [set aside self-righteous pride], so that He may exalt you [to a place of honor in His service] at the appropriate time, 7 casting all your cares [all your anxieties, all your worries, and all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares about you [with deepest affection, and watches over you very carefully]” (1 Peter 5:6-8).

I love how this translation says to cast all your cares on God “once and for all.” The spiritual practice of naming our pain and giving it to God should be a once and for all thing, indeed. God loves you that much!

And God is able to handle your pain … but only if you turn it over.

Take it to the Lord in Prayer by Michelle Robertson

Resting in God’s Timing

Posted on by Betsy

Do you have a favorite prayer? I do. It goes like this: “God, give me patience. AND GIVE IT TO ME RIGHT NOW.” I remember my grandmother quietly reminding my fidgeting self that patience is a virtue. One that I apparently never got!

One of the spiritual practices we all tend to forget is the one that is made for folks just like me. We are invited to rest in God’s timing, taking time to allow his word to take root in us before taking action. It is an invitation to let Scripture “marinate” in our souls as we deliberately watch and wait for an appropriate time to act.  

 When we focus on God’s timing (and not our own), we recognize that God is actively working in our situation, which means we don’t have to respond in anger or frustration. It is a way of hitting a “pause” button that allows our minds to regroup and reconsider. It also allows for hope and assurance to find their way back into our troubled hearts because we gave space for their presence.

 There probably is no better example in the Bible of someone who rested in God’s timing than Job. When he lost everything important to him and found himself sitting on an ash heap, scraping his sores and wounds, he had no choice but to wait. But when his wife taunts him to curse the God who took everything away, he replied,

 “Don’t talk like a fool! If we accept blessings from God, we must accept trouble as well.” In all that happened, Job never once said anything against God” (Job 2:10, Contemporary English Version).

There is a “silence” component of resting in God’s timing that may involve some tongue-biting. Have you ever regretted an outburst? I have. Had I waiting on God to lead me to a better response, I would have had a better result. Remember, everything was restored to Job in the end. Job’s story is a good reminder of why this spiritual practice is important.

Resting in God’s timing is an act of submission. It draws us deeper into our Lord’s call to deny ourselves, pick up our crosses, and follow him (Mark 8:34). As we lay down our selfish need to act in haste, waiting on God’s timing will surely teach us new ways to allow God’s will to be done in our lives. Try it today, and see!

Come Unto Me, And I Will Give You Rest by Kathy Schumacher

Clothed

Posted on by Betsy

It is that time of year in the Outer Banks when you need every season of clothing accessible to you. You may wear all seasons in one day. A week ago we left the house with the heat turned on, wearing jackets and boots. A week later, we’re in sandals and short sleeves. Who knows what next week might hold?

If you’re like me, you give your clothing selections serious consideration. Things need to be appropriate, flattering, cost-effective. comfortable, and like Goldilocks’ porridge, not too hot and not too cold. Clothing is how we armor ourselves for the world. It says who we are before we say who we are. Clothing can make or break an interview, a first date, or your credibility. Mama was right to counsel us on the fact that clothes not only should fit, but they should also fit the occasion. If you’ve ever misjudged an outfit and wore something way too casual for what turned out to be a formal occasion, you know what I’m talking about.

In this beautiful passage from Luke, we continue the Easter story by exploring what happened during the 40 days after the resurrection. Jesus met with his eleven disciples to give them some last instructions and marching orders. Notice in verse 44, he almost says, “I told you so” without really saying “I told you so.” Good restraint, Jesus!

Luke 24 (New International Version)

44 He said to them, “This is what I told you while I was still with you:Everything must be fulfilled that is written about me in the Law of Moses, the Prophets and the Psalms.”

So, in this important moment, he reminds them of what he had already told them regarding the prophecies from the Pentateuch through the Psalms. He was the fulfillment of it all.

45 Then he opened their minds so they could understand the Scriptures.46 He told them, “This is what is written: The Messiah will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, 47 and repentance for the forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem. 48 You are witnesses of these things. 49 I am going to send you what my Father has promised; but stay in the city until you have been clothed with power from on high.”

Jesus gives them the startling news that they will be clothed with power from on high. I’m sure that just as they had no idea what his messiahship would entail, they had no idea what this would mean, either. But the gift that our Lord promised enabled them to take the Gospel and go into the world and form a new church. And here we are today, recipients of that gift as well.

The Ascension of Jesus

50 When he had led them out to the vicinity of Bethany, he lifted up his hands and blessed them. 51 While he was blessing them, he left them and was taken up into heaven. 52 Then they worshiped him and returned to Jerusalem with great joy. 53 And they stayed continually at the temple, praising God.

The clothing of the power of the Holy Spirit brought the world the good news of forgiveness of sins and the promise of the resurrection of the dead. This is a good reminder to us today as we sometimes get frustrated with the politics and policies of our churches. When we remember the main purpose of the church and by whom the church is powered, it helps us stay focused on our mission, and we can then continue to clothe ourselves in other things, as Paul suggests:

Colossians 3 (New Living Translation)

14 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.

16 Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. 17 And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.

Above all, clothe yourselves in love.

What are you wearing today?

Clothed in Glory by Michelle Robertson

At Home

Posted on by Betsy

Do you ever long for “home?” Where or what is home to you? When I was attending an out-of-state college, my longing for home was fierce. I missed the quiet of my teenage bedroom, the comfort of my mother’s cooking, and the bellowing sound of my dad’s laughter. When they passed away, a significant part of home passed with them. After my mom’s funeral, I was pierced with loneliness for her and my dad. It is very likely that I will never go home to New Jersey again, since I no longer have family there. Home can mean many things.

Jesus beat out all the Methodist preachers in being the first “itinerate” preacher. He never had a home. Did you ever think about that? In his desire to heal, teach, proclaim the kingdom of God, rebel against injustice and Roman authority, and provide a way to the Father, he never had a place to call home. And so he made himself a home for us, so that no matter where we are or what we miss, we can always come home to him.

John 15 (The Message)

9-10 “I’ve loved you the way my Father has loved me. Make yourselves at home in my love. If you keep my commands, you’ll remain intimately at home in my love. That’s what I’ve done—kept my Father’s commands and made myself at home in his love.

It sounds so simple. Make yourselves at. home in my love. How? By keeping my commands. Jesus set the example himself by keeping his Father’s commands. He is at home with the father so that we can be at home with him. Love is our home.

11-15 “I’ve told you these things for a purpose: that my joy might be your joy, and your joy wholly mature. This is my command: Love one another the way I loved you. This is the very best way to love. Put your life on the line for your friends. You are my friends when you do the things I command you. I’m no longer calling you servants because servants don’t understand what their master is thinking and planning. No, I’ve named you friends because I’ve let you in on everything I’ve heard from the Father.

Wholly mature joy comes when we love one another as Jesus loves us. Sacrificially. Unreservedly. Completely without prejudice, barriers, or grudges.

Equally, as friends.

Can you love like that? What holds you back?

16 “You didn’t choose me, remember; I chose you, and put you in the world to bear fruit, fruit that won’t spoil. As fruit bearers, whatever you ask the Father in relation to me, he gives you.

17 “But remember the root command: Love one another.

Imagine how much better the world would be if we could follow this one simple root command, to love one another.

I Call You Friends

Let All

Posted on by Betsy

I listened to a friend lament recently about her teenage years and how she felt completely excluded from her high school’s social life. Let’s face it; kids at that age can be viciously mean. It can be a dog-eat-dog world for four years, and we feel lucky to survive it through graduation. I suspect even the popular kids feel the tension and pressure of constant scrutiny and criticism. I’m pretty sure that the “mean girls” learned it from somewhere.

And of course, there are mean teens who remain mean through their adult years. We live in a society that elevates bullying. If you think I’m wrong consider the popularity of the “Real Housewife” franchise. Exclusion of one cast member is the goal of every episode. We are living in a world where put-downs and bullying are experienced from the top tiers of government to the kindergarten playground. What can we do? Surely this is not God’s plan.

The lectionary this week seems to be focused on the inclusive nature of the kingdom of God. From the psalm we will read today to the birth of the church in Acts to the later writings of John, the emphasis is on the church of “Jesus the Open Gate.” See if you can spot all the inclusive words and phrases in Psalm 22:

Psalm 22 (Common English Bible)

I offer praise in the great congregation
    because of you;
    I will fulfill my promises
    in the presence of those who honor God.
26 Let all those who are suffering eat and be full!
    Let all who seek the Lord praise him!
        I pray your hearts live forever!
27 Every part of the earth
    will remember and come back to the Lord;
    every family among all the nations will worship you.

Here is my count so far: “Let all” is mentioned twice; “Every part” and “Every family among ALL nations” follows.

28 Because the right to rule belongs to the Lord,
    he rules all nations.
29 Indeed, all the earth’s powerful
    will worship him;
    all who are descending to the dust
    will kneel before him;
    my being also lives for him.
30 Future descendants will serve him;
    generations to come will be told about my Lord.
31 They will proclaim God’s righteousness
        to those not yet born,
        telling them what God has done.

In this section, the psalmist talked about ALL nations, ALL the earth, ALL who are descending to the dust (some of us faster than others …), future descendants, generations, and even mentions those not yet born. That pretty much covers everyone! God’s kingdom will not be like high school, thank the Lord. All will be welcome to enter … even real housewives.

Wouldn’t it be lovely if we started living God’s kingdom here on earth today? I think the choice is completely up to us.

Kingdom Rise by Michelle Robertson

Catchin’ and Cleanin’

Posted on by Betsy

I am going to espouse an unpopular opinion about new member classes in the church. Hear me out, now. It’s important for you to know that not only do I think they are a good idea, but I have taught them most of my career. So here comes the unpopular part: I don’t think they should be a requirement for joining. Yes, they should be offered so that people can connect with ministries and learn more about both the local church and the larger denomination, but no, they should not be a mandatory part of the joining process. Don’t come at me, now!

You see, I never once read in the Gospels that Jesus required anything in order to be a part of his movement. He certainly never said you had to attend a six-week class on Thursday evenings first. He just said, “Follow me.” To the disciples he said, “Follow me and I will make your fishers of people.” Now, to put this into fishing jargon, I think the logic here is that you have to catch the fish before you clean the fish. Are you with me?

Many decades ago I had an unsettling encounter with a church member named Roy. Roy demanded an audience one Monday morning because on Sunday, we had allowed a young couple with two different last names but the same address to join the church. (We used to publish new members’ addresses in the bulletin. It will come as no surprise to you that we stopped doing that the very next week. Read on.) Roy was leaving the church because he was highly offended that this obviously unmarried couple who were living together (“in sin”) were allowed to join the church. After carefully explaining that there was no church policy to prevent this, I finally said, “But Roy, you have to catch the fish before you can clean the fish.” Roy left the church anyway.

It astounds me that people who are so focused on someone else’s sin want to bar them from the ministry of the church. What is the point of the church, then? I once heard someone say that the church is a hospital for sinners, not a sanctuary for saints. Good thing! That’s the only way I got in.

Our passage in Acts makes the outrageous point that the Holy Spirit had been poured out “even on the Gentiles.” Can you imagine? The Gentiles! (By the way, unless you’re Jewish, you’re a Gentile.)

Acts 10 (Common English Bible)

44 While Peter was still speaking, the Holy Spirit fell on everyone who heard the word. 45 The circumcised believers who had come with Peter were astonished that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out even on the Gentiles. 46 They heard them speaking in other languages and praising God. Peter asked, 47 “These people have received the Holy Spirit just as we have. Surely no one can stop them from being baptized with water, can they?”48 He directed that they be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ. Then they invited Peter to stay for several days.

Peter sets the course for the church in this one single act. All are invited. All are included. All are welcome. Then Paul came along and taught the early churches some really good theology. Peter caught, Paul cleaned. “The Holy Spirit fell on everyone who heard the word.” Guess where people today hear the word? In church.

When the Holy Spirit spoke, no one could stop the movement of the Spirit among both Jews and Gentiles.

Why should we?

Gotcha! by Michelle Robertson

You Made it Disappear

Posted on by Betsy

Have you ever lain awake at night with your mind spinning over an insult or rejection? I sure have. I wish I was as strong as I apparently look when it comes to taking hits from people who are displeased with me. If you are a people pleaser, you know what I’m talking about. It is hard to come to the reality that someone simply doesn’t like you if you are that type of person. People pleasers suffer from any kind of rejection and the pain of a direct assault can last for months. Truth be told, part of the problem is that we keep poking at the injury like a sore spot in your mouth that you just can’t stop touching with your tongue. If you are also a people pleaser, my prayers go out to you! Sometimes I just wish I didn’t care so much.

The flip side of this personality type is that because we do care, we often feel and respond to other people’s pain in an effort to mitigate their suffering. I bet if you put people pleasers in a room, you would find that they volunteer in care ministries in their churches, donate to the food pantry, go on mission trips, and extend Christ ‘s compassion to hurting people in the world. So here’s a thought, people pleasers: When you’re sleepless over an injury get up and do something good for someone. That will mitigate your own pain, too.

Our Scripture today talks about practicing real love. It succinctly makes a connection between Christ’s sacrifice for us and how we are called to live sacrificially for others. In our Message translation, Eugene Peterson contends that when we see a need and do nothing, God’s love disappears, and we are the ones who made it disappear.

1 John 3:16-24

16-17 This is how we’ve come to understand and experience love: Christ sacrificed his life for us. This is why we ought to live sacrificially for our fellow believers, and not just be out for ourselves. If you see some brother or sister in need and have the means to do something about it but turn a cold shoulder and do nothing, what happens to God’s love? It disappears. And you made it disappear.

This should be something we practice daily in everything we do. When you post negative things about someone on social media, you are making God’s love disappear. When you speak out with anger when you could have held your tongue, you make God’s love disappear. When a disagreement causes you to leave a relationship and you burn the house down on your way out, you make God’s love disappear.

When We Practice Real Love

18-20 My dear children, let’s not just talk about love; let’s practice real love. This is the only way we’ll know we’re living truly, living in God’s reality. It’s also the way to shut down debilitating self-criticism, even when there is something to it. For God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves.

When people pleasers like me get attacked, it’s not just the initial injury that keeps us awake. It is our incessant need to review the situation over and over and over again, criticizing our own actions and condemning our behavior. Our worried hearts get stuck on replay, and even when we try to repair the relationship, we fail to shut down the internal turmoil that the bad encounter has brought. It is hard for us to accept that there are some people and situations where resolution isn’t possible, and truthfully, the other party doesn’t care. They have moved on to criticize someone else while we allow them to live rent free in our heads.

That’s when it’s time to let go and give it over to God. God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves.

21-24 And friends, once that’s taken care of and we’re no longer accusing or condemning ourselves, we’re bold and free before God! We’re able to stretch our hands out and receive what we asked for because we’re doing what he said, doing what pleases him. Again, this is God’s command: to believe in his personally named Son, Jesus Christ. He told us to love each other, in line with the original command. As we keep his commands, we live deeply and surely in him, and he lives in us. And this is how we experience his deep and abiding presence in us: by the Spirit he gave us.

This last section is the real goal for everyone, people pleasers or not. God invites us to please him, not others. He invites us to love one another, keep his commands, live deeply and surely in him, and experience his abiding is us through the Sprit that he gave on. So if you are still feeling the sting of someone’s negativity, let it go.

God has set you free.

Bold and Set Free by Michelle Robertson