1 Corinthians 13

Unbreakable Cord

Posted on by Betsy

Last week I wrote a few devotionals about the famous “love passage” in 1 Corinthians 13 and its prominence at weddings. You remember that one: “Love is patient, Love is kind…love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” … It certainly is a lovely choice for every wedding-type occasions!

But to be honest, I actually prefer a different scripture when I officiate a wedding. It comes from the Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes:

Ecclesiastes 4 New International Version (NIV)

9  Two are better than one,

    because they have a good return for their labor:

10  If either of them falls down,

    one can help the other up.

But pity anyone who falls

    and has no one to help them up.

11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.

    But how can one keep warm alone?

12 Though one may be overpowered,

    two can defend themselves.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken

It is that last verse upon which a strong homily, and relationship, can be built. The way it applies to relationships is this: There are two people in a relationship who are bound together spiritually by adding the “third strand” of Jesus Christ. Couples who come to the altar to make a covenant with each other and with Christ are inviting and including the power and presence of the Holy Spirit to provide strength and beauty to their relationship.

Think of a braid. Two strands alone are weak. Three strands woven together are ironclad.

Does this mean Christian relationships are impervious to disruption? Sadly, no. When one or the other partner unbinds themself from the relationship, or from Christ through sin, the cord indeed can fall apart. In decades of marriage counseling I’ve heard the same story told with different characters. At some point of tiredness, ennui, boredom, or temptation, one pulled away from the braid and the relationship unravels. When “self-importance” overtakes the importance of “us,” that single strand elects to go wayward and the grip is loosened enough for the Enemy to pry in and pry it apart.

I think it is fair to say that the Enemy, whose job it is to “steal, kill and destroy,” finds the breaking apart of relationships, marriages, and families a veritable playground for the havoc he comes to bring. Couples in jeopardy will spend years in the breaking-apart and putting-lives-back-together process. The grief, expense, overwhelming fatigue, anger, and debilitating soul-exhaustion that can accompany divorce can pull people away from their faith as they negotiate the troubled waters of permanent separation.

Keeping Christ at the center of your marriage, family, and relationships gives you the best weapon against this. When you turn your eyes upon Jesus and partner with him as a couple in your home, work, leisure time, finances, and focus, you stand a better chance of surviving the fiery darts that assault all relationships. And joy.

God invites you to find shelter in him:

Psalm 62 New International Version (NIV)

1 Truly my soul finds rest in God;

    my salvation comes from him.

2 Truly he is my rock and my salvation;

    he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

3 How long will you assault me?

    Would all of you throw me down—

    this leaning wall, this tottering fence?

4 Surely they intend to topple me

    from my lofty place;

    they take delight in lies.

With their mouths they bless,

    but in their hearts they curse.

5  Yes, my soul, find rest in God;

    my hope comes from him.

6  Truly he is my rock and my salvation;

    he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

7 My salvation and my honor depend on God;

    he is my mighty rock, my refuge.

8 Trust in him at all times, you people;

    pour out your hearts to him,

    for God is our refuge.

No matter where you find yourself today, whether it is in a strong and committed relationship or in the chaos of one that is breaking apart, pour out your heart to God and trust in him. He is your rock, your salvation, and your refuge.

God is our Rock by Kathy Schumacher

Over ALL Things

Posted on by Betsy

Let’s take a look at Paul’s famous love passage one last time, and today, pay particular attention to verse 7:

1 Corinthians 13 (New Revised Standard Version )

4 Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable; it keeps no record of wrongs; 6 it does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth. 

7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

This love comes from Jesus, who loves with an agape love that Paul contends is patient, kind, and “bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.”

Did you notice how Paul repeated the word “all” four times in one sentence? Paul used the Greek word “panta” for “all things” in this passage, which leaves no room for doubt about what he is saying. 

Panta means “all encompassing.” For example, the word pantheism is the belief that God is in everything. The word pantry is the place where you put all your food. A panacea is a cure for everything. So Paul is emphatically saying that love doesn’t exclude anything or anyone in the way that it bears everything, believes everything, hopes everything, and endures everything. No one is left out. Cherry picking things to love that are lovable doesn’t qualify. 

This passage challenges us as individuals and as a church that we are to love as Christ loves. Are we truly a church of open hearts, open minds, and open doors? Even when we experience differences, do we put on love over everything?  Remember what Paul wrote to the church at Colossae: 

Colossians 3 (Common English Bible)

12 Therefore, as God’s choice, holy and loved, put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 Be tolerant with each other and, if someone has a complaint against anyone, forgive each other. As the Lord forgave you, so also forgive each other. 14 And over all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. 

There’s that word again: all things. Over ALL THINGS put on love.

To be called to offer agape love to the world is the mission of the church, and it starts here. Our one and only job is to teach the world hope that is grounded in God’s unconditional and unwavering love for all of us. At the end of time we will be judged on one thing alone, and that is our ability to love.

How are we doing?

Over All Things by Michelle Robertson

What Love Isn’t

Posted on by Betsy

1 Corinthians 13 (New Revised Standard Version)

13 If I speak in the tongues of humans and of angels but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers and understand all mysteries and all knowledge and if I have all faith so as to remove mountains but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all my possessions and if I hand over my body so that I may boast[a] but do not have love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable; it keeps no record of wrongs; 6 it does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth. 7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

One of the things I love about Scripture is how you can read it at about 85% of your weddings over 25 years of ordained ministry and all of a sudden you spot something new when you read it one day. That happened to me last week when I suddenly noticed that of all the things Paul said that love IS, he mentioned way more things that love ISN’T. Did you ever notice that before? Do you think that was intentional? Given what he was up against at his church, I definitely think he was calling them out because they were doing way more things that love isn’t than what love is. So Paul is giving us multiple words about what love isn’t in order to help us discover what love is. Listen again to what he said:

4 …love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth.

So that is what love isn’t. 

It isn’t arrogant, so love would never think its own opinion was more intelligent or valuable than another person’s idea. Indeed, love would quietly accept diverse thoughts and listen carefully to other perspectives. 

Love isn’t jealous and doesn’t covet the things other people have. Love is satisfied with what it has and doesn’t need to go out and look for a younger model.

Love doesn’t seek its own advantage, which means that love celebrates everyone else’s achievements and success, and doesn’t put someone down in order to lift itself up. When there is no jealousy, there is no competition for attention. 

Love isn’t rude, so love is careful to be polite in conversations. Relationships break down when labeling, finger-pointing, and name-calling happen, so love is careful to show respect to others. 

Love isn’t irritable, so love takes a moment when something irritates it and prayerfully figures out a mature way to respond. 

Love never enters an argument with a list of past grievances, because love FORGIVES. Have you ever been in an argument with a loved one and find yourself re-hashing old issues? Is that love? What love forgives, love forgets.

One of the things love doesn’t love is injustice and so love works hard to be sure everyone is treated fairly. And love loves truth, especially the One who is the Way, the Life, and the Truth.

I think Paul’s advice can stand as a valuable checklist for evaluating the quality of our love. If you approach your loved ones, your friends, and your neighbors as a jealous, complaining, irritable, rude, and offensive smart-alack, you might need to have yourself a “come to Jesus moment”. Because nowhere in scripture does it say that Jesus loved like that.

Take a look back at what love isn’t and use it as an evaluation of the love you show people. How do you measure up to Paul’s standard of love? Are there any areas for improvement?

Paul says if we do not have love, we are nothing. Go out and be a something today.

Rejoice by Michelle Robertson

Agape Love

Posted on by Betsy

Last Sunday I had an opportunity to preach and the lectionary assignment was 1 Corinthians 13, Paul’s famous “love passage.” I think I have read this at about 85% of the weddings I have officiated. It was read at my wedding and my parents, too. Was it read at yours?

1 Corinthians 13 (New International Version)

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

While this is a fabulous choice for a wedding homily, Paul did not have weddings in mind. Indeed, he wrote this as a kind of rebuke to his church in Corinth. You see, the church had fallen into divisions based on several popular leader’s personalities. Some people in the church claimed to be “from Apollos,” others from “Cephas,” and others from Paul himself. Paul insisted they all consider themselves to be from Christ and Christ alone. He pleaded for them to be of one mind and one purpose, pointing out in Chapter 12 that each person was given a spiritual gift to be used in conjunction with the others for the betterment of the entire Body. This current division along the lines of personality cults was very disturbing to Paul.

The result of their infighting was bitter partisanship that resulted in a complete failure to relate to one another in love. The dramatic failure of these church leaders to act humbly and appropriately in the face of competition for status and influence fueled the division, and some took to adopting arrogant positions of theology that opposed what the Scriptures actually said. Does any of this sound familiar? I think we could drop Paul’s response right into today’s world. Corinth was in the middle of a culture war … I would argue that so are we. Corinth was suffering greatly from people blindly following personality cults, and they completely forgot that Jesus is the only leader we should follow.

So, let’s talk about love.

In the New Testament, we find three forms of the Greek word for love. The first is eros, which describes the intimate, passionate love between two people. This is the love we experience in physical intimacy, and it is a love to be celebrated according to Paul.

The second form of love in the New Testament is philia, which describes the love between friends. It is a fellowship love, a brotherly love … in fact, philia is the root for the name of the city of Philadelphia, the “city of brotherly love.” Many of you know that I grew up eleven miles outside of Philadelphia, so you will forgive me when I point out that if you want to experience the brotherly love of that city, don’t attend a sporting event there. Philly fans are a breed unto their own, I’m telling you!

The last form of love is the word agape, which is defined as a love that is given with no expectation of return or reward. It is a self-sacrificing love. It is a love that gives no thought to self-interest, self-gratification, or self-preservation, but offers unconditional love at any cost. It is a Jesus-on-the-cross kind of love. Some of you have experienced agape firsthand on a Walk to Emmaus. This is the kind of love that Paul talks about in 1 Corinthians 13, and I promise you, it will be agape love that will save the world.

The challenge of the church and the mission of the church is to show agape to a world that doesn’t understand the concept. How can you do that today? How can you show undeserved love to your family, friends, and neighbors? Where will you be the reflection of Jesus that loves with no expectation of return or reward?

Go out today and agape someone. You will be blessed if you do.

Jupiter and the Moon by Gary McDonald

What Love Isn’t

Posted on by Betsy

How many of you have ever heard 1 Corinthians 13 read at a wedding? I can imagine many of you sitting at home with your coffee mug in one hand and raising the other. It is a well-known wedding Scripture for a good reason: it speaks to the heart of what love is. But did you ever stop to notice that it actually says more about what love isn’t?

It is in the ”isn’ts” that this passage has its greatest power, especially in a world so filled with hate. Somewhere, somehow, we as a society turned a dark corner where hate-filled rhetoric is not only accepted, it is the norm. Just look at the flags, bumperstickers, social media posts, and click-bait ”news” bits where self-important commentators inflame the audience with derogatory and damaging statements that go unchecked. Unchecked, until the online comments begin. Then hate parries hate, and things escalate until you stop and think to yourself, ”Where is the love? Where is the goodness? Where is civility? Where are your manners?”

Paul’s letter to the church in Corinth had nothing to do with weddings. He was facing a contentious congregation that was devolving into patterns of us-versus-them, and hate was unleashed. So he wrote these timeless words:

1 Corinthians 13 (Common English Bible)

13 If I speak in tongues of human beings and of angels but I don’t have love, I’m a clanging gong or a clashing cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and I know all the mysteries and everything else, and if I have such complete faith that I can move mountains but I don’t have love, I’m nothing. 3 If I give away everything that I have and hand over my own body to feel good about what I’ve done but I don’t have love, I receive no benefit whatsoever.

4 Love is patient, love is kind, it isn’t jealous, it doesn’t brag, it isn’t arrogant, 5 it isn’t rude, it doesn’t seek its own advantage, it isn’t irritable, it doesn’t keep a record of complaints, 6 it isn’t happy with injustice, but it is happy with the truth. 7 Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all things, endures all things.

So that is what love isn’t. It isn’t arrogant, so love would never think its own opinion was more intelligent or valuable than another person’s idea. Indeed, love would quietly accept diverse thoughts, and would silently agree to disagree.

Love isn’t jealous and doesn’t covet the things other people have or seek its own advantage, so love celebrates everyone else’s achievements and success, and doesn’t put someone down in order to lift itself up. When there is no jealousy, there is no competition for attention.

Love isn’t rude, so love wouldn’t post anything that is offensive, even if it agreed with the meme/post/article. Love wouldn’t hide behind flags that use profanity (or euphemisms for profanity), even if it doesn’t like the person to whom the profanity is directed.

Love isn’t irritable, so when love sees those flags, she bites her tongue and keeps on driving.

Love never enters an argument with a list of past grievances, because love FORGIVES.

One of the things love doesn’t love is injustice, and so love works hard to be sure everyone is treated fairly. And love loves truth, especially the One who is the Way, the Life, and the Truth.

8 Love never fails. As for prophecies, they will be brought to an end. As for tongues, they will stop. As for knowledge, it will be brought to an end. 9 We know in part and we prophesy in part; 10 but when the perfect comes, what is partial will be brought to an end. 11 When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, reason like a child, think like a child. But now that I have become a man, I’ve put an end to childish things. 12 Now we see a reflection in a mirror; then we will see face-to-face. Now I know partially, but then I will know completely in the same way that I have been completely known. 

We have a chance every day to choose love. That’s it. That’s the choice. You either love or you hate. May we choose a love so vibrant and strong that it brings glory to our Father and honor to our family. Remember, they will know that we are Christians by our LOVE.

13 Now faith, hope, and love remain—these three things—and the greatest of these is love.

Love’s Pure Light by Alice Rogers